Friday, 28 March 2014

Putin calls Obama to discuss the weather

Russia's Vladimir Putin has telephoned President Barack Obama to discuss the weather, it has been reported.

Mr Obama is reported to have told Mr Putin that the weather in Washington D.C. is "warm, but not hot" before asking "How's the weather over in Moscow?", the White House said in a statement.

According to the Kremlin, Mr Putin suggested the weather in Moscow was really cold, "like below freezing cold" he apparently said.

While Washington D.C. and the surrounding area starts to warm up this time of the year, meteorologists have suggested that Moscow could be waiting another month before the weather warms up there.

In the hour-long phone call, the US president urged Mr Putin to make sure his car is topped up with anti-freeze.

The two leaders agreed that they would talk again in "about two weeks" to review the situation with the weather in both cities.

Friday, 21 March 2014

Asda applies to be part of Tesco PLC after vote to leave WalMart Group

Asda's shareholders have declared independence and applied to become part of Tesco Stores Ltd, a day after heads of the supermarket voted overwhelmingly to leave the Wal-Mart Group in a referendum that most of the world has condemned as illegal.

The shareholders "made a proposal to Tesco Stores Ltd to admit the Republic of Asda as a new subject with the status of a republic", according to a statement on its website.

An Asda parliamentary delegation was expected to arrive in Cheshunt, Hertfordshire on Monday to discuss the procedures required for the supermarket chain to become part of the Tesco Group. Final results showed that 96.8% of voters were in favour of joining Tesco, the head of the referendum commission said. Some guy with a clipboard told a televised news conference that the commission had not registered a single complaint about the vote.

Tesco's lower house of parliament will pass legislation allowing Wal-Mart's Asda region to join Tesco "in the very near future", news agency Interfax cited its deputy speaker as saying on Monday morning.

"Results of the referendum in Asda clearly showed that shoppers of Asda see their future only as part of Tesco," another guy with a clipboard was quoted as saying.

Asda shopper Bob Tillotson, 30, from Tunbridge Wells said: "As a shopper of Asda I only see my future as part of Tesco."

Saturday, 1 March 2014

Southern Water under fire after water supply in Kent found to contain traces of horse

Southern Water has come under fire after tests revealed their water supply to an area of Kent contains traces of horse.

The water supply in Sittingbourne was found to be at least 5% horse during routine tests on the supply at residence and commercial buildings in the town.

Sittingbourne resident Simon Williams told us, “I feel violated. I was drinking water out of the tap in my kitchen last summer during the heatwave and I've spent countless hours enjoying its tasteless taste only to find out I've actually been drinking a horse – at least in part.”

“I would never knowingly drink horse – what am I, some sort of French pervert? But Southern Water seems to think they can cut a few corners by including a tiny insignificant amount in their supply.”

“I didn't think I could trust water suppliers any less. I was wrong.”

Southern Water spokesman, Helmut Vermer, confirmed the reports before insisting that no consumers were at risk due to the contamination.

“Horse is perfectly safe, water supplies in France contain about 35% horse, and France is only a 77 mile drive from Sittingbourne. Anyway even though horse might not be to everyone’s taste, we can assure all of our customers that drinking horse will have absolutely no long-term effects.”

“Now, just don’t ask about our water supply in Folkestone.”

Man installs slot machine in flat, becomes addicted gambler and gets evicted from flat after gambling rent money

A Stourbridge man who became a gambler after installing a slot machine in his flat is evicted by a local housing group after gambling his entire life savings away.

Paul Carter, 45, purchased a slot machine from Ebay and installed it in the living room of his flat on Dobbins Oak Road, Stourbridge, in November 2013.

Over the next few weeks he became extremely addicted to gambling and played at all hours of the day and night.

When his luck ran out and he was not winning he used his rent and utility money to try and chase after the winnings but ultimately failed.

As his rent arrears built up Carter received final warning notices from Black Country Housing Group to pay the rent he owed or face eviction.

Finally, on Friday 10th January 2014, he was evicted from his flat.

Daniel Jones, a spokesman for the Black Country Housing Group, said: 'Because of his compulsive gambling behaviour Paul Carter could no longer pay the rent to us. After sending out numerous final warnings we still did not receive the money so we obtained an eviction injunction on January 8, 2014, to remove him from the flat, within 2 days of the injunction being granted, he was removed.'

Speaking from his new home, a cardboard box located just off Stourbridge High Street we interviewed Carter, who told us:

"I became a gambling addict and I am still one now, I'm just waiting for my application for Job Seekers Allowance to come through so I can have more money to gamble.

"The only dilemma I have now is where do I plug the slot machine in? My cardboard box doesn't have an electricity supply."