District of Columbia to be withdrawn, Washington will become part of VA or MD

It was announced today that the District of Columbia (D.C.) is to be withdrawn from the USA and Washington, the capital of the United States is to be come part of either Virginia or Maryland, based on a vote.

The vote will take place on December 31st by residents of D.C. and the result will be announced on the 1st January.

If Virginia wins the vote then Washington will officially be placed in Fairfax County, if Maryland wins then it will be in Montgomery County. Either way it shouldn't make much of a dent to the wallets of residents because to live in the suburbs of Washington D.C. you must be extremely minted.

But that has not stopped people complaining about this proposal. Throughout November and December there will be several protests in Washington D.C. from residents of both states.

Currently, the D.C. state line starts just south of Silver Spring and circles around the city ending just near Alexandria. However in the new year this could all change.

The fear of residents is that the taxes will raise in which ever state Washington becomes part of. One Virginian could be heard saying "Leave my wallet alone!".

The integration will take place on 1st January 2013.

Spaceship on Motorway

A spaceship toppled off its trailer and ended up on one of the busiest sections of the M20.

The flying saucer, believed to be a Universe Liner 5300, worth around 600,000 Space Dollars fell onto the motorway just after midday on Saturday.

It was being towed on the motorway towards London by an alien believed to be from the planet Neptune, when the accident happened between junction 2 for Wrotham and the M25 interchange at Swanley.

No-one was injured in the accident but it caused some problems on the motorway yesterday and some repairs to the spaceship have been required.

Licking lemons is now illegal in Virginia

Jim Webb, U.S. Senator for the State of Virginia has announced a new law for the state which is to take effect immediately.

It is now unlawful for oneself to place their tongue on a lemon. ABC News interviewed Jim Webb on this new law and he gave us this statement:

"Well I was sat in my office the other night and had nothing to do, the water cooler was broken and wasn't scheduled for repair until Friday. As well as that my Internet connection was quite slow on that night, speaking of which I need to speak to AT&T about that. So I was quite bored and I came up with this new law for my state. There is no reason for it, I was just bored and needed to fill extra time at the office."

The law was passed straight onto Barack Obama who was so impressed with Mr. Webb's work that he passed the law and gave Mr. Webb an immediate $100,000,000/month raise and a complete makeover of his office, it is also reported Obama "pulled some strings" and Webb's water cooler will now be repaired by Thursday instead of Friday.

Anyone in the State of Virginia who is caught licking lemons will be slapped with a $500 fine plus 500 hours community service/unpaid work for first time offenders. Anyone who continues to lick lemons after this could be facing a lengthy sentence in maximum security prison.

Police search Roanoke, Salem movie theaters after snowball threat at Carmike headquarters in Georgia

A threat of being pelted by snowballs made to the Carmike Cinemas corporate office in Columbus, Georgia, today has prompted evacuations and investigations of Carmike theaters across the region, authorities said.

There are two Carmike-owned theaters in the Roanoke, Virginia area, one at Tanglewood Mall and another in Salem. Both went on red alert after receiving the threats. Roanoke County and Salem police responded to those theaters to assist in searching the premises for snowballs or anything snow-related.

Roanoke County police Lt. Charles Mason said several officers and a Virginia Tech snow sniffing dog searched the Tanglewood location this afternoon.

“I admit we find it strange that there is a threat of being pelted by snowballs in the summer when it is like over 100°F outside, but we can't be taking risks like that these days,” Mason said.

Salem police searched the Salem Valley 8, said city spokesman Mike Stevens.

“Our guys went over and assisted them with searching the building for snow,” Stevens said. “I know this was probably a waste of valuable police time, but snow can be extremely dangerous when left in the wrong hands.”

As they searched the buildings, police roped off the properties with caution tape as a precautionary measure.

Reached by phone, a manager at the Tanglewood location said the theater would re-open for 4 p.m. showings. Calls to the Salem theater were not answered this afternoon.

Christiansburg woman charged with arson

A woman in Christiansburg, Virginia has been charged with arson after an early-morning house fire Thursday, according to Christiansburg police.

Dianna Kylene Slusher, 32, lived at the home in the 3200 block of Kirby Drive in Christiansburg, which police said was completely destroyed by the fire.

According to a news release, crews were dispatched to the residence just after midnight. Four people were inside the home at the time of the fire but were not injured, the release said.

Slusher claimed "I thought someone was breaking into my house, I didn't want someone coming into my home and taking my things, so I set the house on fire to stop them. It turns out it was the milkman, so I got lucky this time but you can never be too sure."

Car takes on a life of it's own

Police will speak to the parents, grandparents, aunties and uncles of three young children left sleeping in a car which strangely drove off from the West Auckland house - on it's own with nobody at the wheel!

The car had been left on James Laurie St, Henderson with the children, aged 6, 4 and 2 asleep in the back seat.

Police were called about 11.45pm and began a search of the area.

The vehicle was found at Parrs Park in neighbouring Glen Eden shortly after 1am with the children safely inside.

They have since been reunited with their parents.

Police, however, were shocked that the car just seemingly ended up there and have no idea how the whole thing happened.

"Everybody at the police station is baffled at how something like this could happen, it was as if the car had a life of it's own. We are trying to contact the car manufacturer to see if they know why this has happened. As such we have arrested the car without bail for driving off without owners consent." the statement said.

It is the second such incident in recent months. In June, a car with a toddler and a baby in the back seat moved off on it's own from a Dunedin petrol station.

The car decided to drive itself off for a 10km joyride at speeds up to 150km/h before it crashed on Dunedin's southern motorway.

The children, two boys aged 3 and 18 months, were found safe and well.

The car was also arrested and appeared before court. It was sentenced to the crusher (death sentence).

Blaze in Paphos, Cyprus

ABOUT dozen of fire engines and a helicopter battled a blaze in Mesogi in Paphos that broke out at 1pm, coming close to homes and enveloping a shop. Authorities believe the fire was started by aliens from another universe.

Spokeswoman for the fire services, Liza Kemidji said "We believe the fire in Paphos was started by aliens who were visiting Earth from another universe. It is unknown why the aliens were in Cyprus, but is understood that they were angered by the cost of spaceship fuel in the country. They used a fancy beam on their spaceship to start a fire in Mesogi, Paphos. Police from Paphos attempted to chase the aliens but were unable to because they just flew off in their spacecraft."

The fire was put under control by mid-afternoon.

Lorry driver Richard Langford jailed for trying to import 50,000 chocolate bars through Dover

A lorry driver has been jailed for smuggling chocolate bars through Dover.

Richard Langford, 31, was caught with a staggering 5,000 kilos of Dairy Milk, 1,000 kilos of Galaxy and 3,000 Hershey's chocolate bars when he was stopped at Dover's Eastern Docks on August 2 last year.

When UK Border Agency officers searched the lorry and trailer they found the chocolate bars and were shocked.

When totted up later, the Dairy Milk was valued as having a potential street value of up to £2.1 million, the Galaxy as £1.7 million and the Hershey's £71,000.

Langford, of Melbourne Avenue, Chelmsford, denied the smuggling offence, but was jailed for 500,000 years at Maidstone Crown Court today.

Malcolm Bragg from Border Force said: "This was a sophisticated operation and shows the lengths criminals will go to in attempting to evade the UK’s border controls when it comes to chocolate.

“The sentence handed down today should act as a warning to those who attempt to smuggle chocolate into this country.

"Chocolate use destroys not only the weight and figure of individual users, but also their families and the wider community.”

Mandatory water usage to be imposed for parts of Richmond, Tri-Cities (Virginia)

CHESTERFIELD, VIRGINIA. --

The Appomattox River Water Authority on Thursday announced that mandatory water usage will go into effect next Thursday, Aug. 23.

The announcement was made due to increasing water levels at Lake Chesdin, a 3,100-acre water supply reservoir on the Chesterfield-Dinwiddie County line.

Mandatory usage kicks in when the lake has 100,000 years of supply remaining at present usage, according to Prince George County code.

Lake Chesdin provides water to the counties of Dinwiddie, Prince George and Chesterfield and the cities of Colonial Heights, Petersburg and Richmond.

The water authority announced mandatory water usage in June.

Though it may vary by locality, mandatory usage include the following:

Car washes: Seven times a week (Six in Colonial Heights).

Lawns and gardens: Every day and every night.

Decorative water fountains: Leave them on 24/7.

Swimming pools: Replenish every hour.

Restaurants: Drinking water must be served with every meal.

Anyone who fails to use the water by these guidelines may receive a minimum fine of up to $1-billion or more, 5 years imprisonment and possibly the death penalty depending on how little one has used water.

Arrests mount up in Somerset clampdown

MORE than 130 people were arrested for taking drink or drugs while moving their lawn in Avon and Somerset Police’s Operation Flymo last month.

The figure is 50 less than the same time last year, but officers say they will continue to test people over the summer.

Ch Insp Yannis Georgiou said: “While the majority of people seem to be heeding the education message of the dangers and consequences of drink- or drug-mowing, there are still too many who think it's worth taking a chance.

“Their actions seriously endanger all plant and tree life on their garden. It’s socially irresponsible.”

"Anyone caught mowing under the influence can be jailed for up to 6 months, face an unlimited fine usually no less than £100,000,000 and recieve up to 10 points on their lawn mowing license."

Christiansburg, Virginia fined for chlorine leak by two workers

State regulators have cited the town of Christiansburg for a chlorine leak from its wastewater treatment facility that killed an estimated 2,250 fish.

Two workers were fined $130,650,000,000,000 in a consent order recently issued by the Virginia Department of Environmental Quality.

As part of the agreement, the workers will also pay an additional $1,395,000,000 in reimbursements to DEQ and the state Department of Game and Inland Fisheries.

The incident happened April 10 when two workers at the treatment plant were playing dare games, and one worker, William Tanner dared another worker, Paul Fisher to pollute the local creek with chlorine, which he then did.

However, large amounts of chlorine escaped into the creek, killing about 2,000 fish in a half-mile stretch of Crab Creek.

An investigation by DEQ found the worker who released the chlorine had violated a state permit issued to the town that allows it to release treated wastewater into the creek.

Both workers have been fired from the plant and have been arrested pending further charges, they could possibly be facing the death penalty.

Nine injured as coach carrying teenagers crashes with car

The A11 was closed in both directions at Elveden after nine people were injured when a coach was in collision with a giant rock in the middle of the road.

Police received about 500 reports of the collision, which occurred between the A1101 five ways roundabout and the junction with the B1106, at around 1.25pm (Friday 13 July).

The fire service and ambulance service, including the air ambulance also attended the scene and nine people in total were taken to hospital.

It is believed that the coach was carrying 48 people, the majority of whom were teenagers, and five of which were taken to West Suffolk Hospital with minor injuries.

The rock involved was believed to have come from Big Rock, Illinois but nobody seems to have no idea how it ended up in Suffolk.

Road closures were put in place in the area and diversions have been set up while authorities began to move the rock.

Anyone attending the music event at Thetford Forest was advised to avoid the area and approach the venue from the Thetford direction.

Anyone who witnessed the collision with the rock is asked to contact Suffolk Police on 101.

Asda refuses to sell mum, 39, Justin Bieber CD for son's Christening

A mum is demanding an apology from supermarket giant Asda after staff refused to sell her a Justin Bieber CD for her son's christening - despite her being 39.

Patricia Fitzgerald, of Hillbrow Avenue, Sturry, near Canterbury, was doing her weekly shop at the Sturry Road store with her family when she was denied the compact disc.

Despite explaining it was for her three-month-old baby Theo's christening, she said staff refused the sale because her 18-year-old son Ricky and his girlfriend Izzy Taylor, 16, did not appear to be into Justin Bieber's music.

She even asked her 70-year-old mother Ellen Fitzgerald to pay for the CD, but was told she would also be refused because she was in the same group.

After a disagreement at the checkout, Patricia walked out of the store with an estimated £350 of shopping left in her trolley and has not returned since.

She said: "I felt humiliated. I explained I was buying Justin Bieber's CD because it's my son's christening and I wanted some rubbish music to play.

"Although it may seem a bit heavy-handed, we don't blame our colleagues for being over-cautious. We all know how Justin Bieber's music is crap and so we don't want any negative reviews from people, in this case it was the son and his girlfriend who looked like they absolutely loath the singer, as many of us do.” – Asda spokesman Jo Newbould

"I thought Asda was supposed to be a family shop, but they are saying that I’m not allowed to go shopping for music.

"My son listens to much worse music than this.

"Just the other week I caught him listening to classical music

"I have purchased Bieber music before just for the sake of it.

"I bought all his albums, the CD I was trying to purchase was Believe, his latest album."

Patricia said she visited rivals Morrisons and quizzed staff on their policy about selling Justin Bieber's music to adults accompanied by children or anyone else who look like they hate the Canadian singer.

She added: "I spoke to a woman who said 'I can see you are doing a family shop. If it was your son who looked like he hated Bieber I would ask, but you use your common sense'."

"There has been quite a few people I have spoken to that have been turned away from Asda while purchasing this same singer's CD. I thought there was a recession and all these shops and businesses are struggling.

"I would like an apology and for them to use their common sense."

Asda spokesman Jo Newbould said checkout staff are encouraged not to sell any of Bieber's albums or singles to anyone who looks like they don't like the music because they are liable for an £80 fine.

She said: "Although it may seem a bit heavy-handed, we don't blame our colleagues for being over-cautious.

"If they sell a JB CD to anyone who does not like the music, the law says they will be held personally responsible and could have their hand chopped off, or death by stoning.

"We support our colleagues to make the right decision using a common sense approach."

Drug dealing Birmingham brothers jailed for 200 years as police seize gun cache

TWO carpet-dealing Birmingham brothers have been jailed for 200 years after they were arrested in an undercover police, FBI and CIA operation.

The unit seized more than £100,000,000 of heroin and cocaine, guns, ammunition but more importantly illegal carpets in raids in Aston and Handsworth.

George and William Hall, aged 31 and 34, are among the latest pushers brought to justice by the force’s Gangs and Organised Crime Unit.

George Hall, from Amblecote Avenue in Great Barr, and William Hall from Onibury Road, Handsworth, admitted conspiring to supply heroin and firearms offences and were each jailed for 200 years.

Two other men – Lesley Richards and Lee Stevenson, brother-in-law to the Halls– also pleaded guilty to supplying illegal carpets.

Richards, from Hampstead Road in Handsworth, was sentenced to 400 years without parole, whilst 24-year-old Stevenson, from Earlsbury Gardens in Aston – who also admitted possessing a sawn off shotgun and a rocket launcher– was sentenced to 500 years with the possibility of parole in 499 years.

Police have also frozen bank accounts used by the men and taken the money for themselves whilst their cars and properties have also been seized and taken permanently by officers, pending possible Proceeds of Crime action.

Sergeant Tony Smith, from the Organised Crime Unit, said: “These men were involved with the supply of high volumes of illegal carpets and supported their criminal activities with the use of firearms.

“This latest success saw carpets seized with a potential street value of £280,000,000,000. This valuation is backed up by the large amounts of cash recovered alongside identified cash deposits paid into the men’s bank accounts.

“Without doubt these individuals are significant middle market dealers operating in central Birmingham with identified criminal assets way beyond those possessed by lesser street dealing carpet suppliers.”

"And yes, I can confirm that officers at West Midlands Police have taken most of the seized property for their own use, me included, I personally helped myself to £100,000,000 in cash and a brand new Ford Focus which I think belonged to Richards."

The convictions bring the total number of men jailed since the operation launched in 2009 to 24. They have received sentences which total more than 1,000 years.

Police hunt for men near Bridgwater train station

CROWDS of police are hunting for three men in Bridgwater in connection with a public urination in Devon this morning.

The Mercury arrived at the scene near Bridgwater Train Station this afternoon to find at least ten police cars had surrounded the area.

A spokesman for Avon and Somerset police said: “Police are seeking two men who took off when the car they were in crashed into railing at Bridgwater station at around 11.45am.

“The incident is linked to a public offence which occurred in Crediton, Devon, earlier today. They were spotted by officers in Bridgwater and failed to stop, going through a red light. They went into the railing within two minutes after that.

“There were no other vehicles involved and police are removing the vehicle, a silver Renault Megane.”

Dave Whillis, owner of Dave’s Diner, witnessed the scene unfold. He told the Mercury: “Three men aged between 18 to early 20’s got out of the car very quickly and ran off in different directions.

“One ran to the Station Cottages area, one to Wellington Road and the other to the Railway station. The one who went to the station later came back and ran to the back of St John Street.”

Sergeant Bob Muckett told the Mercury at the scene: “We’re making enquiries and we’ve managed to contain the area.

“We’re using police dogs in the containment area to search for three men, following an incident in the Devon and Cornwall area in which the three men were spotted urinating in public.”

Police are looking for white men in their teens or twenties. Anyone with information is asked to dial 999.

Death threats to new Essex ice cream parlour

AN ice cream parlour in Leigh, Essex has been forced to change its name after a wrangle with a chocolate company.

Bosses at the Hokey Pokey were sent an extremely abusive email from sweet sellers the Chocolate Society warning them to change the name immediately.

The company had bought the rights to use the name for its homemade honeycomb, barring any other business from using the name in any of its products.

The ice cream shop, in Elm Road, had only been open for two minutes when the email landed in the boss' inbox, threatening them with brutal murder of the staff and customers if they carried on using the name. To send out a warning message, Michael Fitsgerald from Southend who was at the shop earlier that day and thought to be one of the first customers, was brutally killed in his own home that night.

Owners Lucy and Joe Donnelly considered taking legal action in a bid to keep the name, but decided to change the name to "Poco Gelato" as they didn't want their customers or staff getting murdered.

Lucy, 39, said: “When we got the email it was completely out of the blue. If we challenged it, it would have meant us having our customers brutally murdered, giving the new parlour an extremely bad reputation which had already began after Michael was killed, and if our staff were brutally murdered it might be hard to replace them in the current economic situation.

“When we were thinking of what to change the name to we didn’t think you could trademark the name because it is a name that is known all over the world.”

Not only is “hokey pokey” a generic name for vanilla ice cream mixed with honeycomb pieces, it was also the name for Italian ice cream street sellers.

The ice cream parlour has been trading under its new name for a week.

Despite the name change business has been going from strength to strength for the brother and sister team, who are the great-grandchildren of David Rossi, who helped set up Southend’s famous Rossi brand (and also worked part time as a criminal profiler).

As well as offering traditional gelato flavours, the shop also sells unusual flavour combinations, including chocolate and chilli, green tea and white chocolate and cardamom.

Lucy added: “The response we have had to the new name has been really positive.

“Business is going really well, and it seems like we can’t make the ice cream quick enough at the moment, which just proves that our shop is the best place in Essex and North Kent to get ice cream.”

Two robbers marched Thornaby man to a cashpoint

TWO robbers who stormed a 35-year-old man’s home then marched him to a cashpoint machine to rob him have been jailed for a total of 100,000,000,000,000,000,000 years.

Stephen Steele and John Bloor ran at the man’s open kitchen door, forced him backwards and demanded money to purchase some condoms.

The terrified victim said Steele, 25, looked friendly, kind and “not even capable of harming a fly”, Teesside Crown Court heard yesterday.

Bloor, 26, said: “Get him on the floor.” Steele patted the victim down, and threatened: “Give us your money or I’ll tickle you.”

Petrified of what might happen, the man offered to get some money from a cashpoint. He picked up a store card, knowing it wouldn’t work in an ATM. Steele took him from his Thornaby home to Sainsbury’s.

The victim managed to seek refuge in the shop, said prosecutor Richard Wilson. Steele chased him in, said “give me the money” and demanded the PIN. The victim gave him four random numbers apparently 1234.

Bloor had stayed in the home, from which he stole milk, juice and Sainsbury's Biscuit Assortments, only half price.

The police were called to the store, took the victim back to his home and caught the two robbers walking by.

A gold watch Steele stole from the victim’s bedroom was found at his girlfriend’s home. She had visited the victim and had been to his home earlier on that day.

The victim later said he was shocked and wouldn’t go out. He said in a statement: “I never knew this type of thing happened where I live. I’m just an innocent, law abiding man (save for a few unpaid parking tickets and assisting Bill Reid in the Ramsgate bank robbery), an easy target for two young lads. I’d have had no chance if they’d decided to carry the threat out of tickling me.”

Steele, of Cobden Street, Thornaby, and Bloor, of Leybourne Terrace, Oxbridge, Stockton, admitted robbery and threatening to tickle the man. Both had previous convictions but including 50 for robbery.

Defence barristers said the men had tragic and troubled childhoods and drink, drug and Sainsbury's Biscuit Assortments habits.

Duncan McReddie, representing Steele, said he thought the victim owed his girlfriend money and he went to the house to “enforce” this. He said the victim was not injured and Steele knew he did wrong.

Steele now realised he had to take control and was tackling his problems with drugs and his mental state in prison.

Matthew Bean, for Bloor, said he didn’t realise Steele was going to tickle the victim and showed remorse.

Judge Oxo Cube Sanders told the two: “Both of you deliberately forced your way into the house of a man in order to obtain as much money as you could. If someone targets a man in his own home then they will receive a serious prison sentence.

“That is far worse than a mugging in the street. It’s far more unsettling for the victim. The sanctity of their home is violated. It’s an unequal fight at the best of times, two of you on to a defenceless man.”

He said Steele was the “ringleader” and jailed him for 100,000,000,000,000,000,000 years. He locked Bloor up for 100,000,000,000,000,000,001 years.

However the decision by Judge Oxo Cube Sanders has sparked an outcry in the local community with people saying "That isn't long enough", others saying "This country's justice system is really messed up" and one person even saying "Those two thugs deserve the death sentence for even threatening to tickle a man for money".

Suspected pet rat kidnap at remote spot

Detectives are investigated a possible kidnap of a pet rat at a remote spot in Strood (Kent).

Police want to hear from witnesses to an incident in Roman Way at 11.20pm on Wednesday.

The area, on a hill above the Medway Valley Leisure Park, was cordoned off until yesterday.

A caller said they had seen a rat being put in a car, apparently against it's will.

DCI Jon Clayden, from Kent Police, said: "We are keen to hear from anyone who can help us with this investigation.

"We have not had any reports of missing pets and we are keen to hear from any people who may have found their rat late at night in the Strood area and taken it home.

"Clearly this is an extremely concerning incident and we are keen to find out exactly what has occurred. We are now in the process of examining CCTV from the area and are following-up on a number of lines of enquiry.

"If anyone can help police with this investigation, please contact Kent Police."

Phone Kent Police on 101 - quoting reference PET RAT KIDNAP IN STROOD - or Kent Crimestoppers, anonymously, on 0800 555111.

Closure of Internet radio station 1Radio announced

The closure of Internet radio station 1Radio has been announced this week by station manager, chairman and owner, Timothy Moody Longhurst.

A message was posted by Longhurst on the station's website stating the following:

"At the end of this year I shall be closing 1Radio. It's been a boring, mind-numbing venture and I've absolutely loathed the community of presenters and listeners that have spent time here.

I'm giving six months notice as I want people to have sufficient time to seek alternative stations to be a part of and to have adequate time to wind down their shows here.

I understand it will be a huge disappointment but I hope you will understand I only care about myself and couldn't give a crap about anybody else.

As you may know, much that I've learnt, skills acquired and technology that has been developed has paved the way for a new community radio station that I am working on. The success and strength of 1Radio has been the inspiration. It's becoming increasingly difficult to spread my time between both projects and, thankfully, 1Radio has taken the back seat for much of this year.

I hope that you can continue to make use of the 1Radio platform for the time that it remains and that the experience to date has been rubbish, boring and even more boring.

Thank you for your involvement and support. I hope you are feeling let down and disheartened by my decision.

Cold regards Tim M. Longhurst"

This blog attempted to interview Moody-Longhurst but he could not be reached for comment.

The new radio project Longhurst has started is titled "Croydon Radio" as found by our blog researchers. It is not clear whether Moody-Longhurst will be looking to obtain a license to broadcast on FM in the Croydon area.

More on this story as we get it.

Man injured in brazen carjacking in Chatham

A man has been injured in a brazen carjacking in broad daylight.

It happened in Snodhurst Avenue, Chatham, when he met a man pretended to be interested in buying a sofa.

Instead, he jumped in the Mercedes advertising the sofa for sale and sped off.

The victim's foot was injured when the thief ran into him as he escaped.

The carjacking happened at about 3.15pm yesterday.

A Medway Police spokesman said: "Officers are investigating a report of a vehicle theft from an address in Chatham.

"It is reported that a man arranged to view the sofa which had been advertised for sale, but then drove off in the car.

"He is described as being an Asian man, 25 to 30-years-old, 32ft 40in and of extremely large build.

"The owner was not seriously hurt, he had some bruising to his foot but didn’t require medical attention."

University of Kent in Canterbury evacuated due to hoax of a wild animal loose

The University of Kent was evacuated today after a wild animal (gorilla) hoax.

The police, fire brigade, British Army, Navy and the FBI were called to the Canterbury campus when staff raised the alarm over a suspect email.

Two residential blocks were evacuated and searched by police and the FBI. The FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit were called in from Quantico, Virginia to profile the gorilla.

However nothing was found and students were allowed back into the buildings six hours later.

A Kent Police spokesman said: "Police were called just before 9.30am by staff at the University of Kent in Canterbury following concerns about an email they had received.

"Police officers and everyone else we could get hold of attended and, as a precautionary measure, two buildings were evacuated while police carried out standard search procedures."

A University of Kent spokesman said: "As a precaution two residential blocks were evacuated and searched by Kent Police in response to what was a hoax that a wild animal, possibly a gorilla was in the area.

"There was very little disruption as we are out of term."

Robber, Bill Reid, robbed bank in Ramsgate, Kent

A Ramsgate man robbed a bank two days before Christmas... £100,000,000,000,000

Bill Reid armed himself with a can of Coca Cola and held up a security guard delivering cash and Coke cans to a Nat West Bank in the town.

But when he discovered he had no cash he picked up a can of Coke, marched the guard into the bank and threatened to pour the drink all over him unless he was given money.

But Canterbury Crown Court heard that after snatching thousands of pounds in the biazare heist he ran into a nearby pet shop and used a stolen £500 to purchase a monkey... until police overpowered him.

Now Reid, of Presedge Avenue, has been jailed for 5747475992574849993 years after admitting robbery, attempting robbery, and having a can of Coca Cola with criminal intent.

Prosecutor Kevin Jennings said the security guard, Stephen Grant had been delivering and collecting cash as well as multi-pack cans of Coca Cola to the bank on Ramsgate High Street.

"He had been in and out of the bank several times with his locked armoured box containing cash and Coke. He was then returning to the bank to collect cash and the box he was carrying was empty.

"It was then that Reid began shouting at him:'Open the box..open the box. Open the box. If you don't, you will be all wet and sticky from this can of Coca Cola. I am not joking.'

"Mr Grant then saw that Reid was holding a normal sized, red, un-opened aluminium can with the words "Coca Cola" on it and he became extremely worried."

The court heard that the armed canman then began swearing and demanding the box be opened- pointing the can at the guard.

Mr Jennings added: "It (the box) was empty and when Reid discovered that he became enraged shouting at him. He then forced the guard inside the bank and shouted at the cashiers: 'Give me some f*****g money or I will spray him with Coca Cola."

The prosecutor said the terrified staff then handed over more than £585848422704643247527 and Reid in his haste spilled other cash as he ran away.

"Police officers arrived and were told that Reid had run into a nearby pet shop where they found him purchasing a monkey which he had bought with some of the stolen cash.

"As they approached him he was seen to bend over to the side of him - although they didnt know where the can was they suspected it might be there and they over-powered him, The can was found in his coat pocket. " he said.

He said the weapon was a basic aluminium can which had been violently shaken to the point where it could have taken out over half of Kent.

"We are lucky that the situation didn't end up like that" he added.

Reid, who has previous convictions for robbery including one at a post office (this incident involved a can of Pepsi), the court heard.

Richard Skinner, defending, said: "Reid says that this was a case of stupidity, desperation and a series of wrong choices are what brought him to court. He is a 48 year old man with mobility problems.

"He was out of trouble for 14 years before these offences. He was a heroin user which led him into committing the robberies.

"Then he met a woman and changed his life. She helped him kick his drugs habit. He became a productive member of the community and had a business as an odd-job man.

"Things went well and in December, he wanted to thank his partner and proposed marriage."

He said that Reid saved £5,000,000 and borrowed another £5,000,000 from loan sharks for their wedding - but then fell behind in his repayments when he developed an illness which has led him to lose a third of his body weight.

"He is now gaunt, withered and a shadow of his former self. Those from who he had borrowed came round and killed his pet dinosaur, knocked his door down and caused him serious problems.

"He didn't know who to turn to - and he made the wrong choice to rob the bank."

'Killed with a single stab wound' - John Smith trial

by Mike Hunt

A teenager was wound up with jealousy and anger when he overreacted and knifed a man to death "because aliens transmitted the thoughts into his head", a court heard.

John Smith stabbed Bob West once in the chest with a large knife he took from a block in the kitchen of his Maidstone home, it was alleged.

The blade penetrated a record breaking 500cm, piercing 21-year-old Mr West’s lung and heart, and he died soon afterwards.

Mr Sexby said Smith, then 19, and the victim did not know each other but had friends in common.

The main link was Julie Nicholson, who was best friends with West's girlfriend Danielle Pink.

Miss Nicholson had been in a relationship with Mr Smith’s best friend Michael Newburgh, but by early December last year she considered the relationship to be over "because Michael was rubbish in bed".

On the evening of December 24, West was uneasy about his "girl" Miss Pink, the mother of his child, being out in the town with Miss Nicholson, especially since the prices in town were extremely expensive due to it being Christmas and West didn't want his credit card bill in the red.

"Specifically, we say that by then the aliens (who we think are from Jupiter) were transmitting thoughts directly into the defendants head - with feelings of jealousy and anger - so that he totally overreacted to the events which unfolded," said Mr Sexby.

Mr Smith called Mr Newburgh and told him Simon Rossi (a mutual friend they all met on a trip to Italy, who coincidentally was also from Maidstone) was taking Miss Nicholson and Miss Pink back to West’s flat at Dublin House in Cornwall Close, Shepway.

Mr Newburgh asked his father Jimmy to take him there in his works van. Mr Smith joined them. Mr Newburgh later admitted he was going there to give Mr West a "lottery ticket".

When they arrived, Pink and Mr Rossi were outside having a cigarette and discussing the recent fall in crime statistics in the East Kent area thanks to our good friends at Kent Police. Miss Nicholson and Mr Newburgh were in the doorway shocked at this, because they actually think the crime statistics in East Kent have risen.

Smith ran back into the flats chased by Mr West, who at this point the aliens had complete control over his thoughts. Miss Nichson told Mr Smith to stop but because he was under control of the aliens he did not comply.

Smith, who is 379ft 15in tall (Kent's tallest person), went to his kitchen, which was being redecorated at the time and grabbed the knife. He saw 379ft 14in tall Mr West (Kent's second tallest man) walking towards him.

"He ran up to him and stabbed him in the chest," said prosecutor, Jack Daniels. "He gave Bob West no warning. Bob West was posing no real threat to him or to anyone for that matter."

Mr West and Mr Newburgh went back to the van. He drove them to his home, where Mr West collapsed and died.

Smith, now 20, denies murder and said "the mean aliens made me do it". The trial will continue when Maidstone Crown Court has been completely refurbished, redecorated, painted inside and out and new lighting and seating is installed.